Tuesday, Jun 02, 2020 | Last Update : 05:52 PM IST

70th Day Of Lockdown

Maharashtra70013301082362 Tamil Nadu2349513170187 Delhi208348746523 Gujarat17217107801063 Rajasthan91006213199 Uttar Pradesh83615030222 Madhya Pradesh82835003358 West Bengal57722306325 Bihar3945174123 Andhra Pradesh3676237464 Karnataka3408132852 Telangana2792149188 Jammu and Kashmir260194631 Haryana2356105521 Punjab2301200044 Odisha210412459 Assam14862854 Kerala132760811 Uttarakhand9592225 Jharkhand6612965 Chhatisgarh5481211 Tripura4231730 Himachal Pradesh3401186 Chandigarh2972144 Manipur83110 Puducherry79250 Goa73500 Nagaland4300 Meghalaya28121 Arunachal Pradesh2010 Mizoram110 Sikkim100

We talk makes healthier relationship

Published : Dec 29, 2018, 1:44 pm IST
Updated : Dec 29, 2018, 1:44 pm IST

Couples who do we-talk generates positivity in their relationship.

We-talk helps in resolving conflicts.
 We-talk helps in resolving conflicts.

Washington: Any healthy relationship starts with the word "we" and not "I."
Past research by UC Riverside psychologist Megan Robbins emphasized the power of first-person personal pronouns such as "we" and "us" in relationships.

"We-talk" is an indicator of interdependence, meaning partners affect one another's thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. This is a shift from self-oriented to relationship-oriented.

New research by her lab has greatly magnified the body of evidence asserting that the pronouns we use foretell good relationship outcomes.

Robbins and her team reviewed and analyzed 30 studies of nearly 5,300 participants to assert that couples who often say "we" and "us" have more successful relationships and are healthier and happier.

Lead author Alexander Karan said, "By examining all these studies together, they let us see the bigger picture. We-talk is an indicator of interdependence and general positivity in romantic relationships."

Interdependence is tied to relationship-healthy behaviours, such as being supportive in stressful times. "Interdependence Theory," first introduced in the 1950s, holds that interdependent romantic partners are more inclusive in how they think, feel, behave, and rely on each other for support over time.

For the study participants about half of whom were married Robbins' team looked at five measures: relationship outcomes (satisfaction, length of union), relationship behaviours (positive vs. negative interactions observed), mental health, physical health and health behaviours (how well participants take care of themselves).

The benefit was evident in all five categories, and virtually equal for both men and women.

That is to say, we-talk is good for young couples, and it's good for older couples. It's good when resolving a conflict, it's even good when the partner is not physically present. Most importantly, though we-talk is good when one uses it, it's even better when one's romantic partner uses it.

A question that remains unanswered, and is the subject of upcoming research for Robbins' team: Does we-talk make for happy couples, or do happy couples make for we-talk?

"It is likely both," Robbins said. "Hearing yourself or a partner say these words could shift individuals' ways of thinking to be more interdependent, which could lead to a healthier relationship."

Tags: we-talk, we, us, relation, love, mental health, positivity, couples.