Outgrowing each other is bittersweet but staying together when you are not meant to can be painful too.
Breaking up any relationship is difficult, no matter how long you’ll have been together. You obviously have a lot of love and affection, and some great memories together. But if there are some toxic traits that are directly affecting you and your well-being, it may be time to end the relationship.
"Breaking up with your partner is the best thing to do if you feel like you are not happy anymore, and the relationship is just pulling you down instead of pushing you up," dating and relationship expert Celia Schweyer told Bustle. You are meant to grow in life and if your partner should not hold you back.
Here are some questions you should ask yourself before ending your relationship, according to relationship experts.
Is there someone else influencing your decision?
If you are seriously considering breaking off the relationship, make sure it is your decision alone. Don’t let anyone, whether it is a parent, friend or even a potential love-interest make up your mind for you. "Sometimes when you think about breaking up with your partner, it’s because you’ve experienced something you might have not experienced for a long time (especially if you and your partner are together for several years already) with another person," Schweyer said.
Aim I still happy?
Every relationship is fraught with challenges. But if these challenges are causing you more stress and unhappiness than satisfaction, it may be it is time to re-evaluate your relationship. Just because you’ll are good at tackling the bad times, doesn’t mean you’ll should remain a couple. If the partnership is no longer bringing joy, then it is time to go your separate ways.
Is this what I want right now?
Are you happy where your relationship is placed in your personal life? Do you want to be alone and dedicate all your time to your career? "There will always be those times when you’ll feel like you’re getting tired of the relationship because there’s nothing new anymore," Schweyer said. "You feel like you can do more if you’re alone."
These moments come and go but if it is a pressing issue, then you should think about what you want from the relationship and whether you want to continue it or not.
Do we hold the same core values?
If you and your partner initially clicked over common interests, they may not last. If you are at a juncture where you are contemplating the next step ahead, then take a look at your core values. "Preferences in daily life will change but core values will likely not change," certified relationship expert Adina Mahalli said. "You could feel like it is time to break up with your partner because those core values are showing themselves."
Am I just bored?
"Culturally speaking, we have a tendency to create problems or kick things up if our relationships grow dull, tiresome, or seem to be in a lull," Artschwager said. "But all relationships are constantly going through cycles of newness, excitement, stability, slow period, and so forth." If you are not able to re-ignite your relationship by doing new things together, then maybe it is time to part ways with your partner. You’ll may have hit an irreversible slump.