Are you a pizza type lover or a burger type?

The other day, a very interesting conversation left its mark on me. It was right about when I was out with the high priestess and her sister and we were ordering burgers. Being a guy, I knew exactly what I wanted to eat and being girls, they decided to split their burgers in halves to be able to try two different kinds. I tried to ignore them; I always stay away from such culinary crimes.

And I was chided almost! Would I not have shared a pizza with the major half of my relationship? Why then was the suggestion of splitting a burger so abnormal to my ears?

“She can have as many bites of my burger as she likes!” I came back, (I was trying to salvage my reputation of not being cold and devoid of emotion), “but splitting a burger in half is just… it’s just, I mean, there should be a law against such things!”

Alas the dinner went on, a subtle shade of silent, and I offered to share my ‘one whole’ burger but there were no takers; they were happy to eat sawed off bits from each other. Those deviants I tell ya!

And all that silent eating made for some retrospection. All those studies deducing ‘What kind of a lover are you’, well the result of one such questionnaire should tell you whether you are a pizza type lover or a burger type lover.

A pizza type of lover would be someone who is willing to share his or her meal. They are even happy to order a half and half. Some may think these the signs of a great partner — adaptability, flexibility, non-stubbornness — but to me they come across as omens of a non-committal type. A pizza lover is a wishy-washy kind who goes with the flow. He/she is too democratic to stand for anything specific. And given how you can construct your pizza, it shows lack of formed principles.

A burger type, on the other hand, may come across as stubborn but in fact shows character and belief in a set of values. You don’t make a burger, they come pre-set on the menu. You can take a bite but you don’t cut it up. And you eat the same burger all the way through, no half and halfs here. A burger is another word for commitment. To allow someone then to take a bite from your burger, knowing well that one wrong bite or improper grip could let the whole thing fall apart, that’s true selfless love. You don’t have all such risks with a pizza!

A pizza type is accommodating, while a burger type, isn’t so much. A burger is like a decree from higher up whereas a pizza is a popular vote. So the next time you order fast food, see what kind of a lover your partner is. Contrary to what this may have seemed, this is not a gastronomic column. It is always meant to be food for thought although this time around just writing this has made me considerably hungry.

The writer is a lover of wine, song and everything fine