Man for the hearth too

We debate if the paternity leave is just another “holiday”

While working for the welfare of the fairer sex, women and child welfare minister Maneka Gandhi was rather unfair in her take on paternity leave. While maternity leave now has been extended to 26 weeks, demand for paternity leave, too, is gaining ground. However, according to the minister chances of paternity leave being misused are high. Current regulations allow government employees to go on a 15-day paternity leave while there is no such law in the private sector. “Men in India do not utilise their existing leaves in order to take care of their child. If men gave me one iota of hope by taking sick leave for child care, then yes, we can think of mooting a proposal for paternity leave,” the Union minister said. She compared paternity leave to another “holiday”. In a country, which promotes “hum do, hamare do”, the responsibility should be shared regardless of gender. Therefore, we spoke to some professionals and new fathers for their take on her statement.

A shared responsibility Dr Mahesh Joshi, CEO, Apollo Hospitals’ Home Healthcare, feels as a co-parent it is also the father’s responsibility to take care of the child. While he concedes that some may misuse paternity leave, he is of the opinion that it essential for both parents to be granted some time off. “It is unfair to paint all the men with the same brush. Yes, traditionally, a mother has played the dominant role in the upbringing of children; but times are changing. In fact, when my boys fall sick, they preferably want me to be around rather than their mom. Also, being in the home healthcare business and attending on quite a few newborn babies, I’ve seen for the first time that fathers are equally if not more indulgent in attending to the needs of the baby,” he says. Stand-up comedian, Sorabh Pant, who is father to a one-year-old son, also seems to share this viewpoint. “The first three to six months are extremely crucial and it gets really exhausting for a wife to single-handedly take care of the child; so both parents need to pitch in to take care of the baby. Even when I’m vacationing with my son, it seems like I’m working because I’m always alert to his needs. Paternity leave, I think, will be a step ahead for all fathers,” he says. Chartered accountant Joji Thomas Abraham, who works in a private company, was granted a week off as paternity leave when his daughter was born three months ago. He says, “Maneka has made a misinformed statement. During the initial stages, a woman is in physical pain after delivering a baby. You cannot expect a mother, who has just delivered a baby, to take care of the child’s daily needs. A baby is a joint responsibility and one needs to ensure that the mother is recovering too. In today’s times, where nuclear families are the norm, it is extremely important for men to get a longer leave.”

Background Matters According to designer Esha Hindocha, however, a change in attitude does need to come about for men to take up greater responsibilities. “It depends upon men’s upbringing. It’s not just about the ‘baby-chores’, but day-to-day household chores as well. Men have always been taught that ‘household jobs, bringing up babies’ are “women’s jobs”. In fact, the men who do help out their wives are often mocked for being “joru ka ghulam”. A house and a baby are joint responsibilities of a couple. Men and women realise that taking care of children is a tough job. Paternity leaves should be allowed only in companies and cities where the rural crowd doesn’t work.”